Thursday, April 1, 2010

Easter Holy Week

Tonight we just finished the Maundy Thursday service where we commemorate the Last Supper before Christ's cruxificion. Stephen preached on how we get so familiar with the hymns, the liturgy, the message of Easter that Easter becomes mundane and we often loose our joy. It was a very creative service. We didn't sing hymns...we read them... He preached on 2 Kings chapter 6 this really bizarre story about a man who lost the cutting edge of his axe in the water and thus lost his purpose, joy and power...we too loose our cutting edge - all that we have to do is acknowledge our loss of joy, and take it back...God will give us joy again...He will restore our cutting edge, our joy, our Holy Spirit power.

My joy in the Lord is strong. Christ is gifting me for service all the time, and I am happy to do His work. I love Him more than anything. My cutting edge is still there, but for some reason I feel overwhelmed and aimless. I want a fresh new outlook on life, I feel so stale. My love for the Lord is solid. My joy in the Lord is evident. My peace is there, I have many friends, but my heart feels lonely and it has for quite some time. I ask myself why I feel so alone and why I want to be alone. I have no answers. I spend alot of time with the Lord...so that is not even my answer. I guess I will just wait but I would rather be "doing" something about this. Waiting seems so stale too.

What do you do when you feel so alone, so stale, so weary of the same old thing? What do you do when you want something to challenge, excite and put a new perspective on your outlook on life? Perhaps this is what they call that "Mid-life crisis"! Or maybe we are still recuperating from Steve's heart attack. He has so many limitations now, perhaps we are just mourning the loss of vitality and energy. Perhaps we have faced mortality and life has just become more serious for us?